It has been far too long since my last blog and I am sure I will not remember everything that I have meant to capture over the last two months or so but I will try.
I am currently sat in a hospital ward looking at a number of monitors watching my mum sleep. She has been skirting with death over the last few weeks but earlier today she spoke clearly for the first time. She continues to amaze me on how much determination she has and her unbelievable fight . Her first thoughts on becoming lucid were that we are all spending too much time visiting her as we have very busy lives and should be looking after our own family members.
Over the last few months three members of my family have been quite poorly each of their situations is different but they have all been similar in the way that they have dealt with great difficulty.
All have been robust and positive never feeling sorry for themselves except for the briefest of moments. Each has continued to support others whether that is at their work place or at home and maintain their commitments without taking time out from busy diaries.
It could be said that keeping busy has also helped them stay focused on other things in their life and not their illness and so potentially aided their recovery. I do not doubt that this is the case but it also shows the essence of who they are. I love the word essence. The essence of who you actually are?
There has also been the possibility that I could lose not just one but all three of them. It has been along time since I felt that kind of apprehension or fear, a fear where I was not able to control things. In my own life it has been a long time since I was not able to control my thoughts and doubts about the future. I have always believed that I am in control of my destiny and whilst that remains the same I am not in control of other people’s destiny and their destiny has certainly not been clear.
These moments always open up the opportunity for self-reflection on what is important in your life. It has also allowed me to reaffirm that I am a very lucky person. I actually have most things in life to make me happy. My job is something I love, I am surrounded by family who I like and love, I am able to still develop my own interests/hobbies, I continue to develop as a person, I get to help other people and also have fun.
I think it is important to have an inner and outer purpose to life. At times like this I am always brought back to writing down the five things that are most important in my life and if I were to die tmw would that list change. How interesting that the list never actually changes that much, I just need to look at how much time I actually spend doing and enjoying those things. It is also very interesting to note that not one of the materialistic things I have achieved or have in life make the list.
It has also reminded that me that I must continue to live in the NOW and take time to ensure I am consciously aware of what is happening in my life. Not get too lost in the future wishing my life away or in the past analysing too much why I did something. I must ensure that I take notice of the people and environment that is around me because that is what makes life the most pleasurable.
I wonder what is the essence of you???? When you sit and think about the things that are important how often are you consciously aware of what is going on around you? Nothing like a little self-reflection from time to time.
The summer has been busy and the World of sport has been fantastic. I have been fortunate to have been involved in a number of areas and the most important one was that the Olympic Games passed by without a single major incident of note. That is a credit to all of those people that were behind the scenes from the police to military to emergency services. They truly did an outstanding job.
As for the performances, passion and humility shown alongside the desire to win. What more could one ask for.
I was also pleased for Andy Murray, I could never quite warm to him but his performance at Wimbledon and his desire as well as support for team GB made me rethink my position. It enabled me for the first time to support him unconditionally at the US open and even if he had been playing one of my favorite players I would have still wanted him to win.
I have been involved in a number of team sports of late and I have been been asked to comment on a number of incidents where the code of conduct and standards of a team have been questioned. They have been questioned because in difficult times it is easy to take the easy option and drop your standards or code of conduct. This may bring short term gains but it will never work in the long run. Once you break a code or indeed a standard they are hard to bring back. What can be seen as an exception soon opens the floodgates to other demands and then a break down in the team ethos. Fortunately in each case the teams have realized that they can’t lower their standards if they want to be number one. That does not mean there cant be exceptions but those exceptions have to be clearly explained to everyone in the team and that the person/persons who have gained an exception are clear that this is not normal and they are still to strive for the common standard or be out of the team.
My knees have been taking a pounding of late. I have started training quite hard after my operation to clear out both knees of various bits of debris. As a result I have subsequently had gel injected into them so that the bone is not quite rubbing on bone and there is a little lubrication. Hopefully this will assist over the longer term (and hopefully shorter term). Later today I am also going for a double session of deep tissue massage to beast my body back into shape.
The book launch will now be on the 16th October, which I am looking forward to. I have already started another book this one is a novel of which I am a third way through and I have ideas for a second book on leadership and development or possibly parenting.
On Wednesday I also went to watch the Para’s v Marines in a boxing match to support the Afghan trust. It was an outstanding evening and the Para’s won 5-3. This will also be shown on Sky Sports so hopefully people will get to see two of the finest units in the World do their organizations proud.
Have a wonderful weekend……………